Following is a checklist presented by expert psychologists and marriage counselors regarding habits practiced by truly happy couples. Whether you are a newly married couple or just about to tie the knot or have been married for several years now-try and follow this advice and see your life blossom!
1. Walk hand in hand when they go out
Many couples are wary of public display of affection; but psychologists believe that couples who walk hand-in-hand together stay together. We can take cue from happily married Hollywood star couple Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt- they are always pictured holding hands-whether they are filmed secretly by paparazzi or on the red carpet. Hand holding shows support for your better half-no matter what!
Image: Studio Bangalore
2. Avoid judgmental attitude
Research suggests that partners unknowingly trigger defensiveness in their better halves by making judgmental statements as below:
- “He should have done that”
- “She was rather inconsiderate!”
- “How can anybody think like that?”
If you find yourself thinking like that, it is time to watch your thoughts. Sure, it is okay to fight and argue once in a while, but it must be without prior judgment.
3. Do not share all secrets
Couples who tell each other everything are not necessarily the happiest. In fact, research shows that over quarter of the happiest couples do not share everything with their spouses.
Image: Ankur Dandekar Photography
4. Show curiosity about each other’s work/lives
People who succeed at their relationships maintain curiosity about their relationship throughout. It shows that each partner is willing to take the time to find out what the spouse/ partner is looking forward to/proud of and so on. However, this must be done while giving complete cognitive space to the other. As they go through their separate days, each one spends time thinking what the partner may be doing, and remembers to ask what her/his day was like when they are reunited in the evenings.
5. Believe in the best
Every relationship will have its ups and downs. Happy couples choose to believe that their mate cares for them, no matter what they are seeing or feeling from their partner at that time- and act accordingly. Remember that no matter how bad the times may seem many positive things happen and if couples fail to notice them; that’s when the relationship is destined to fail.
Image: Arjun Kartha Photography
6. Have a sense of loyalty towards each other
Even roommates get along well- but intimate partners have a sense of emotional commitment –a sense that they are on a mission or a journey together. Couples destined to succeed, always talk about their hopes and dreams and also encourage their partners to do the same. Happy couples realize that if they squash their partner’s dreams to fulfill or realize their own, they will lose an important aspect of their relationship- a sense of loyalty.
7. Talk to each other politely and with respect
Successful partners both require that their feelings are respected. They also make it easy for the partner to be respectful by refraining from making assumptions that that their partners are wrong. They avoid criticizing their partner and instead ask their partners to work towards solutions that take both preferences into account.
8. Spend quality time
It is important to spend some time alone with your spouse without the in-laws or friends even if it is small things like going to a coffee shop for a cup of coffee. This time alone is particularly important for couples living in joint families -where each one can listen to the other attentively and to full extent. Even if both partners are working and do not have enough time to go out to watch a movie, they must find the time to do so at home, over the weekends.
Image: Theia Photography
9. Volunteer together for a service
When a couple works towards a common goal of helping the needy, they automatically develop gratitude in their hearts for their good health and better circumstances. Many marriage counselors believe that doing so helps prevent couples from withdrawing inside their small world of married life to share a higher purpose of serving the society. This is very beneficial in uniting them into one heart at a deeper level.
Main image: Reality Foto Clicks
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