‘Chai pe Bulaya Hai’ – 6 Points to Talk about when Meeting Prospective Groom

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In Indian culture, arranged marriages are the way to go. Most of our parents got married the same way and enjoy a happy marriage that lasts forever. Since ages it has been a tradition for parents to look for prospective brides and grooms for their children. The set up was strictly formal and the boy and girl only saw each other for a few minutes. Based on this one meeting where they were not even allowed to speak to each other, they selected their partners.

In these modern times, the dynamics have changed quite a lot. Although, it primarily remains the parents’ job to look for suitable ‘rishta’, it is no more their say only. Young, independent guys and girls are now taking their own decisions after a couple or sometimes several meetings. We have 6 points to talk about when meeting prospective grooms.

Meeting Prospective Grooms

Place of Residence

If you are a working girl, it is absolutely necessary to find out if the guy plans to settle in the city of your work. Be clear and try to find out if he has plans to settle in any other city or country. If you are uncomfortable with moving cities or countries, make sure you make this known.

Work Status

If you are working and plan on continuing to do so after marriage, let him know. In case you are happy to be at home and would like to be home after the marriage, let him know that too. Many grooms aspire to go and work abroad. A working women may have to give up her job if he decides to move after marriage. Be absolutely sure that you are ready to be housewife if it so happens.

Meeting Prospective Grooms

Spiritual/Religious Inclinations

In India, there is lot of emphasis on religious inclinations. There are lots of customs and rituals each family follows. There also exist some atheists in our society. If you are a religious person and indulge in rule laid down or an atheist, let the other person know. It is quite essential to agree on this. It may lead to perpetual disagreements in case of mismatch of religious expectations.

Responsibility towards Family

If your family’s responsibility is on you financially or otherwise, let the guy know that. This point should be made at the outset of the meeting. If there are any difference of opinion on this, the meeting is headed nowhere. Also, ask about his responsibilities.

Meeting Prospective Grooms

Hobbies/Interests

If you are a Bollywood fan, love long drives, amusement parks, let it be known. Some interests are very personal and often difficult to include others. These also must be spoken about. Ask him about his hobbies. Due to the difference in personalities, the list cannot be identical, but at least a few interests are expected to be common.

Morning/Evening person

This point is vital. If you two are opposites, you’ll never get any time together. If you both have jobs, it’ll become even more difficult. Morning person’s interests are so totally different from that of an evening person’s.

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