Whether you opt for a love marriage or an arranged one; trust and reliability are essential among modern couples. According to relationship expert and Harvard academic Dr. Robert Epstein, (who does not advocate any one type of marriage, rather wants people to learn from both types) says that arranged marriages are done with careful thought and homework, whereas love marriages are more based on initial physical attraction. Similarly, author of Divorce Doctor, Francine Kay also believes that arranged marriages are often more determined to make it work.
We are not advocating any one type of marriage here; rather we firmly believe that both kinds take a lot of hard work. A relationship with solid foundations is likelier to last longer and has all the key elements like trust, reliability and honesty.
Here are 4 important aspects of building trustworthy relationships right from the start:
- Engage in trust building activities – In many Indian arranged marriages, the couples hardly get to spend time together before their wedding. Activities like shopping together for the marriage trousseau can help couples understand each other’s likes and dislikes and also help build trust. Happy are the couples who help decide things for each other without questioning the decisions. Wives can trust their husband’s driving abilities just as husbands can allow their wives to shop for them, or arrange the décor or menu during a party etc. Couples must naturally offer their help to each other during such activities without interfering. These are some ways of building trust, according to many marriage experts and relationship advisors.
- Leave no room for lies– A strong relationship is based on honesty; even a small lie can be like a termite that destroys the foundation of the relationship. If you are going out for drinks with friends, do not lie to your partner about having to work late. This can have disastrous repercussions.
- Express yourself – When asked for opinions, it is best to express them honestly rather than hiding the truth. Lying, even if they are little white lies, may actually lead to hidden resentment, anger and negative feelings that can cause huge problems down the road. Showing one’s true nature in the beginning rather than putting up a show or pretence is a lot better for most kinds of relationships.
- Tackle problems right from the start– Rather than sweeping issues under the rug, it is best to be upright about your feelings especially about your partner’s relationships with others. This can help couples deal with many problems right from the initial stages of the relationship and also tackle problems in advance. This is also conducive to an atmosphere where either partner is able to bring up problems and, in doing so, work together towards the solutions.
These are four ways in which couples (whether in arranged or love matches) can create strong, beautiful and lasting relationships. What are your thoughts…do comment below!
Images: Featured: Moments That Matter Photography & Sandeep Gupta Photography